I have to admit that I continue to struggle with any form of meditative practice. I am able to eek out a certain period of time, to calm myself, but withing minutes my mind is off and racing. I have been getting up early every morning to use my new treadmill. I have been trying to use this time for my meditation as well as finding quiet time. I don't get frustrated during the process, but afterwards I become very frustrated in the fact that I can't focus long enough to benefit from it. As I have said before, it's a work in progress and I will continue to practice..... :)
"One cannot lead another where one has not gone himself” to me means essentially, practice what you preach. This is another concept I struggle with because I believe we all have the right to chose how we live our lives. This is something I deal with every day on an important level. For example I got a new patient who is currently living with his son and daughter-in-law. They have needed hospice services for this man for some time now, but have been afraid because they were sure once we saw the condition he was in, we would take him away and place him into a nursing home. The bottom line is the patient and his family want to keep him home until he passes, and it's my job to ensure that happens. I had a patient last year who was dying of lung cancer. Every time I came to visit her, she would ask me to take her outside to smoke. Why should I refuse her? She wanted to live out her remaining days with what joy she could find and I am certainly not her judge and jury. I had to fight with the lady who orders equipment at our office because I needed some expensive oxygen equipment so one of my patients could go out to dinner and gambling one last time with her husband before she died. She never made it out, but you better know that oxygen was there at the ready in case she felt strong enough to go.
In my experience, it is more important to help people achieve their own happiness rather than preach at them and expect them to follow instructions. That is not to say I do not educate my patients and their families on what is right, or the benefits of following guidelines etc. But, after I educate I support their decisions.
Hi Rachel,
ReplyDeleteHow are you? Thank you for the compliment/suggestion, as I am considering continuing to blog because I feel like I am isolated so often and wanting to express myself.
The few cousins that I talk at length live quite a distance and have grandkids!
For me, I have experienced a lot prior to having my sons and it becomes a daily effort to separate me from the care for my disabled son, and keep my 17 yr old on a track to college. So having a blog lets me remember when I was full of adventure and traveled, and it helps to bring out who I am now, "Round Two", as I call it.
Right now I am pulling a night shift, at least thats how I feel because after seminar, I put my son to bed and it takes me up to 45 min, after changing his underpants and clothes getting him into the harness to be lifted by the ceiling lift put into bed and positioned to try to avoid reflux during the nite (our recent medical issue), and the whole time he usually sleeps during this and to me it is so cute and peaceful, and I pray that he never fully realizes high tiring it is for me.
Then we're up at 6 to get ready for school!
What may come to your mind as an RN is the idea of seeking respite care, and for me it causes anxiety, as this weeks discussion involves being able to walk in someone else's shoes, I can't bear the thought of someone who appears to be capable but is actually insensitive when I am not around. That day will certainly come as I get older and he gets even bigger, and I understand that.
Like you during the day I am not able to quiet my mind to meditate, and the phone keeps ringing or I have an appt somewhere or take care of the house inside and out although doing yard work which I perfer, to doing dishes but thats me, oh yes there is school! And I say that to say, that when I think about it there are activities that I perform that promote peace and meditation for me, and the conflict I have with the method being presented in this course is that it suggest, that it is the primary way to meditate, but it doesn't work for me.
Let me take that back, it does help me fall asleep!
Rachel,
ReplyDeleteI fully agree about teaching, then allowing the person to make their own decisions. They are the one who has to live with that decision - or die because of it, as the case may be. We cannot force our own wants, beliefs, or decisions on others. It is just an exercise in futility and frustration! I have experienced this type situation when a wife came in with her husband to his therapy session. She kept telling me to tell him that he would be better off if he would just do everything she was telling him (nagging, to my mind) to do. It was aggravating, as I felt like I was stuck in the middle of a battle while trying to work! Disconcerting and fruitless. Some of what she said made sense, but a lot of it was nonsense. I suggested that she offer reasons for her way of thinking, then allow him to make the decision for himself - especially if his decision wasn't hurting anyone but himself. He kept coming for therapy, but she never returned with him! lol
MaryAnn