One of the things I've noticed while doing these exercises is that while I may be able to relax, I'm having real difficulty with re-focusing my mind. I like the theory of loving kindness as well as the exercise, but so far I haven't feasibly been able to do it.
Part of the problem I encounter is that the majority of my life is already spent taking care of others. This past summer was particularly difficult both with work and illness in my own family. I spent an inordinate amount of time traveling and struggling against the medical community. During this period of weeks, my health took a nose dive. I recognized it, but when your in the midst of adversity, it's not always possible to take a step back. What I ended up doing was waiting until everyone had been taken care of, then I took a week off work. I turned my phones off and only did things I found enjoyment in. This made huge strides in replenishing my reserves, but I'll be honest, I still feel like I need another week.
I fully believe that the world would be a better place if we took the time to take care of one another. This is where loving kindness comes into play, what a concept, being kind to one another.
A pattern that has come into focus for me is that I could truly benefit from Mental Workout. My greatest escape/pleasure comes from reading. I love being transported into the words of a book and leaving myself behind. What I am realizing the further into the semester I go, is that my mental workout is severely lacking! LOL I need to work out my mind everyday just like any other muscle. I think the best thing for me to do is just as the book states, starting with 15 minutes twice daily to begin my exercises.
Rachel,
ReplyDeleteGreat post! It is interesting to see you discuss the loving kindness as good in theory, but application is more difficult. With the amount of work, family, school, etc that must be addressed through the week being enough to handle it is hard to envelope the exercise mind, body, and spirit. Hopefully you will be able to make time to start trying this during your busy day. Good luck!
Hi Rachel:
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you have come to an important realization. Knowing that we need to exercise our "mental muscles" is the first step to developing a plan to do so. What do you think might help?
Dr. Aguilar
Start by drowning your mind in just the thought of love and kindness. If you repeat this to yourself while listening to it as well no other thoughts should penetrate. You don't need to take the time to turn on the computer and put in the CD to do this..Simply put a load of laundry in the wash and stand over it for just a few more minutes once you have finished to allow yourself this thought. The white noise from your washer will block other sounds out, till you get better at silencing your thoughts w/o the aid of white noise.
ReplyDeleteTo be alone with your mind and only have silence and experience love and kindness and exhale it to others is a practiced art.
Great post Rachel, I think you are on to something when you say that some of the difficulty you are having may have to do with your profession as a caregiver. It is tough to relax by focusing on this, when you stress about focusing on it all day long. I think that Lindsey has some good advice, but perhaps you just need to try another exercise. I also think that if we all spent more time caring for one another there would be less issues in our world. It is difficult to be vindictive, angry, and bitter when you are caring for another or being cared for.
ReplyDeleteRachel,
ReplyDeleteI understand where you are coming from completely! Having been a Massage Therapist for nearly 25 years, I have gotten used to having people rely on me for pain relief, stress relief and straight forward TLC. There are times that I have to just schedule days off in my planner to make time to rejuvenate my own system or else I pay for it by getting sick. Don't you believe that our mind/body/spirit will force us to make time for rejuvenation if we don't take the time consciously?
I learned the love of exercising my mind from my Mom. She loved to read, learn new things (though she only went through the 8th grade herself, as she was born in 1918 during a difficult era for those who weren't rich to actually have the opportunity to finish school) and she was great at brain-teasers and puzzles. There are such simple, easy ways to exercise our minds that can be fun and relaxing at the same time!
MaryAnn